My sexual urges

My sexual urges as an adult have been on life support now.
My hormones have been freaking up and if Paul talks about if you will burn marry, then well i haven’t been burning only but have been burning to ashes.

The sleepless nights
The jogging
The blocking of some people who may be potential emotional escape
The wild fantasies
The God-please-take-this-urges-please-please

Several times I have thought going in for a one stand with a stranger and boom! Vanish afterwards.

For the past week I have been reminded of God’s plan for intimacy, how He wants it from me but I swear I didn’t know this was going to be this hard.
So I decided to go back to my convictions and ask his strength for my weakness.
And should I fail, oh boy I will pick myself up, dust myself and Keep walking.
God has called us in a journey not a destination.
And maybe every step is part of it.

Today I searched through my stuff and found something I framed six years ago.
My name is Jo.
I have chosen the vulnerable path of Christianity
To tell the struggle
To tell the victory
And to remind you… YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

This is not for everyone, But this is for People like us. Because not only has it been scary the things I have been yearning to speak about. But I knew chapter 27 was about Daring greatly!! And so that’s what we are going to do.


2 thoughts on “My sexual urges”

  1. Abaeku Wangara

    This poem reminds me of 9 years past when I succumbed after years of countless full-throttle bonfire. So I said to myself, ‘to hell with it’ and knowingly ‘fell.’ Do I regret it? Not exactly. It was an experience that diffused the tension within my loins. Have been celibate since.

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